Stop Fucking Ruining Music You Talentless Fucks In Suits

"Speakeasy / at the link it's easy" is probably the benchmark of favourite records becoming the property of the snarling, soul less, gack hoofing ad execs. One day Joe intern comes in to work whistling a tune and Farquad McSuityprick goes, "You know what the tune really summarises for me? That's right... the sweet sensation of chemically induced alpine freshness" and bam, The White Stripes are advertising toilet bleach.

The White Stripes were lucky though. They got away with an imitation, royalties avoiding, tribute to 'Hotel Yorba'. Shed Seven on the other hand were gripped by the afformentioned ad exec douchebag, and whilst noshing on his coke shrivelled dick Rick Witter uttered the immortal words at the head of this post. That has to be the tipping point for selling out. Shed Seven re-recording one of their few really good songs for a mobile phone shop staffed by a tricked out Nova's worth of garage and RnB loving wankers hopefully pursuaded any bands who could smell the greenbacks that you could go too far. It hasn't stopped it happening though, and it's understood. For every Shed Seven there might be a Jose Gonzalez forging success from oblique and inventive commercials.

The only execptions to the rule - doing an advert = loss of all credibility, respect and rock n roll heritage - were Levi's and maybe now Sony. Do a Levi's / Sony ad and not only were you garunteed a number 1 single (when that counted for something) but also a place in rock n roll legend. Give me a man on the street who doesn't know the wolf whistle on the Steve Miller Band's 'Joker' or knows Handel’s ‘Sarabande’ without actually knowing that's what it's called.

Recently Jonathan Richman and The Modern Lovers ended up advertising Weetabix with 'Egyptian Reggae', The Sonics started hocking something along the lines of sanitary towels with 'Have Love Will Travel' and now just to really fuck the world inside-out Langhorne Slim is selling Pedigree Chum. Pedigree 'Dog Feeding' Chum? It's no Levi's Launderette that's for sure. So Langhorne may not have actually said 'Woof' himself but someone's made that call and he's pocketed the fee. Does it air in the USA, or is it specifically for the UK so he'll never have to face it? I'm sure it's not going to stop his following turning out but they'll remember it, some will definitely lose sleep over it and others will be set off on an unsatiable dialogue that followed a sleepless night wrought with emotion and a loss of faith in things they held dear.

When will Levi's start doing TV ad campaigns again?

Langhorne Slim, The Borderline, 5/11/08

It’s the best I can do to keep from yee-harring after Langhorne Slim at the Borderline on Manette Street. It’s been a full 2 years since last seeing him play at the Knitting Factory, NYC, where he obligingly let two ticketless mates in on his request. That gig converted two staunch indie kids, fresh off their rights-of-passage-tour-of-the-world, to the dapper hillbilly-folk-country of Langhorne Slim.



Anyone new to the sound and exhilarating live performance he brings with the War Eagles (as his long standing backing band are now credited) will tonight have been converted too. From the outset with ‘The Electric Love letter’ to the crescendo of ‘And If It’s True’ Langhorne strutted and peacocked, hitting glorious high notes as well as he roused bar-room sing-a-longs. With no conceited mention of the previous days election result, modest acceptation of local adoration and a subtle approach to audience participation the set segwayed older, Dylan-judas-period-esque, folk tunes ‘I Will’ with produced and rounded newer efforts ‘Colette’.

By maintaining a close and personal relationship with his fans Langhorne was able to pause and hold the audience teetering on the breath of a next line before 'cutting it down' or shoo away the War Eagles for an intimate rendition of 'Worries'. Maybe one of the most endearing qualities a Pennsylvania born anti-folk, pro-folk, country-picking, nashville-hillbilly in a world of homegrown and imported shit-gaze, dark-wave, revivalist indie music is that every inch of his performance is believable. Never looking for one moment like he'll ever stop enjoying what he does.

It's not unusual to feel cheated by new material and hanker after older personal tunes but tonight no one did. Everything from the more recent self-titled album, and new unheard material shone like burning coal and welled up an emotional holler from anyone close enough to care.

Langhorne Slim ‘Rebel Side Of Heaven'

Making Music Videos is Easier if You Know a Band

White Denim - Let's Talk About It
Dir. Carlos LaRotta

Cheesey 70s fake moustache and hearse style; uncomfortable tableau style framing and set-up; glorious Texas sunlight; down at the carwash; a fat guy shaking his tits; skewed surrealism; slow tracking camera movements. Sweet.

It took them 3 days to make it, which means low budget but lots of effort. I'm led to understand that the director has done a couple of things just hanging out with White Denim and would probably have had time to thrash out some strong ideas.

Oh yeah, thinking of this as a feature on music videos that are beautifully hand made rather than commissioned by some commercially minded executive I'm reminded of another video...



Langhorne Slim - In The Midnight
Dir. Paul Kermizian

As a constantly touring yet rooted member of the New York anti-folk scene Langhorne is always on the move and this video captured a real truth about his life at the time.

Using a yellow taxi cab, and New York at night, the video is simple yet wonderfully captivating and uses iconography from the artwork of Langhorne Slims album.

Another video that screams low budget to great effect. Either put together by a very canny director or formulated by the director and Langhorne, although as a fan of another of Paul Kermizians video (The Mystery Of Rock Drumming) I have a suspicion it might be the former.